Dating a codependent man

I’ve heard things like “When a guy’s relationship ends, he replaces her.

When a woman’s relationship ends, she mourns,” or “He’s just hooking up with such-and-such to spite the ex-girlfriend,” or “Guys just don’t care” and other nonsense.

Now just so we’re clear, dating and relationship hiatuses tend to be 3-6 months, sometimes longer and they are an in your future. You can let go of all the bullshit, get a clear head and some perspective so you can own your own and let others own theirs instead of taking ownership of other people’s feelings and behaviour, plus you can be free of the burden that many people give themselves of either waiting to be chosen by someone or being a performing seal and trying to convince and convert.

dating a codependent man-38dating a codependent man-85

Each will express their frustrations and have a genuine desire to not go through the same pain again, and yet when I suggest that they take a temporary hiatus from dating and relationships, it’s crickets.In the same regard, when a relationship ends, it is much much harder for a guy to go back and discuss and revisit and talk through and explain, etc. In fact, guys like to keep their emotional spectrum focused on a tight range of emotions – somewhere between amusement and contentedness.So any interaction that a guy knows will bring him out of that sweet range of emotions is an interaction he’s going to do everything he can to avoid.Let’s get clear on what a dating and relationship hiatus is: It’s basically putting your romantic activities on pause so that you can take time to not only break a pattern but to also get to know you, so that when you do re-open your romantic doors, that you are coming from a healthier place.It should be a positive choice to take time out, not the equivalent of being put on the naughty step, because if you’re effectively sulking, stropping, and feeling hard done by, mindset affects actions so you’re not going to be behind your decision as you’ll be undermining it instead.